Where two or three come together in Jesus’ name, there will soon be conflict.
We are to think of people as not merely reducing them to mere people to fill the pews. We are to learn to regard our people as brothers and sisters in Christ. Before we are elders, deacons, or congregations, we are brothers and sisters in Christ.
What Requires for Churches to Work on Peace-Making?
The word “labor” comes from the Greek language’s root word meaning, “Beaten” For those in pastoral leadership understand the reality of hard work. Under major conflict, pastors often feel beaten to pieces.
Pastors lose sleep, sacrifice family time, and put their own needs second to those they serve countless times. These realities of church ministry alone are reason enough for followers to pursue peace by treating their office with respect.
Why is maintaining peace so crucial? Scripture says, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” (Matt 5:9). Which means, peace-fakers are misinformed. Furthermore, peace-breakers are mistaken. Only peace-makers are true signs of being true followers and children of God.
Dear church congregants; Don’t make it hard for him. Be responsive, be prompt, and be cooperative in every way you can. You will give him such joy.
Vulnerability breeds approachability. There are risks in resolution. Be discreet. Don’t manipulate. Just be flat-out honest.
By God’s grace, conflict reset is a stewardship matter; conflict is an opportunity for believers to grow in Christlikeness and that does not happen by accident. We want to be faithful in obedience unto Christ.
Unity requires much prayer, careful listening, long meetings, thorough investigation, and meticulous notetaking. The words “long” and “sufferings” To be patient by definition is to be long-suffering. To stay cool, calm, and collected even when being provoked. That by translation is a “strength-under-control” kind of grace to others.
What if The Leader is Not a Perfect Leader?
We can all learn to follow imperfect leaders and, we don’t have any choice. In this imperfect world, there is no such thing as a perfect leader.
We cannot expect the world to believe that the Father sent the Son, that Jesus’s claims are true, and that Christianity is true unless the world sees some reality of the ones of true Christians. Not fighting.
You care more about being right than you do about being the oneness of unity of the body. Oneness has mattered more than winning arguments in the church.
Despite good intentions, passion for truth, and desire to “defend the gospel” Christians often let their individual agenda get in the way. I have witnessed over the last decade even within my own life, so many pastors suffer from the massive blind spot of pride in their own lives.
No one is more influential in your life than you are because no one talks to you more than you do. You are constantly preaching the gospel to yourself, and with that, you will grow into that kind of gospel. (Dangerous Calling, Paul Tripp).
Church Unity in a Time of Fragile Shaky World
Church unity can be such a terribly fragile matter. The world, the flesh, and the devil war against the church to jeopardize the oneness we have in Christ and tarnish the testimony in a dying world in need of a Savior.
You may only be 10 percent responsible for the conflict, but you are 100 percent responsible for that 10 percent.
Passing judgment on one another is a serious threat to the harmony and unity of the church. As brothers, we refuse to judge each other’s hearts. As team members, we are to give the benefit of the doubt. Our natural flesh wants nothing to do with characteristics like humility, meekness, forgiveness, or forbearance (Gal 5:22-23).
So often conflict occurs because, in pride, fear, selfishness, or all of the above, no one will take the initiative. Romans 12:18 says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you.” He urges the church to be vigilant to keep the unity of the Spirit; he does not tell them to create it, because it is already a fact.
The sad news here: We love OURSELVES and have a wonderful plan for OUR OWN lives. We have a dream. The only problem is that it is not the Lord’s plan.
So often conflict happens over disagreement over “disputed matters” that do not matter. This very reality dawned on me one day as I read Scripture; how huge of a threat a “critical spirit” can be to the unity of the body of Christ.
The Solution to the Heart of Church Conflict
John Calvin in the Institute of Christian Religion said, “Every man’s best advisor is charity”
By nature as believers in Christ, we will reveal a holy zeal for unity and commitment to peace-making. We must guard unity at all costs, to string every possible power to endeavor together by being diligent in keeping peace with one another.
In conflict disruption, we are like ferocious bears walking over each other, pushing, scratching, tearing, biting, and devouring one another, and we do not fear God’s earnest command to preserve unity.
The Corinthians scored more of an F-minus rather than an A-plus in preserving church unity. Corinthians church problem arose not simply from bad ethics or bad practice, but from a bad theology.
Too often in “Anger”, we tend to be minimized, rationalized, or even at times deny the sinful pattern altogether! People who cover up their anger with immediate excuses must unlearn their avoidance style of conflict management. The solution to the conflict is both confession and petition. Confession replaces confrontation, and forgiveness replaces fighting.
No matter how much the church struggles with conflict that disrupts unity, leaders must always thank God for his grace. Even people who are trumpets or critical or unreliable people who are saved by God’s grace.
A prolonged conflict can damage your relationship and destroy your reputation.
Worship will never be wholehearted if we are at odds with a brother. Brothers in conflict eventually will decide to drop everything by essentially having nothing to do with each other. I have witnessed where each will sit on opposite sides of Sunday morning service.
The Sinful Anger be Cured by Repentant Hearts
Since entering into vocational ministry what has caught me off guard most is the amount of anger I’ve witnessed among Christians. I have seen again and again, where Christian brothers and sisters shouting above one another. There are in “The Name of Jesus” who are raising the Bible in anger towards each other.
Anger so often is not one-dimensional. It is multi-faceted so it should not be viewed as stereotyped. A shy or extrovert, perfect or laid-back, he/she can show anger in so many ways.
Men of God don’t typically yell, scream, or lose control. So many people when they don’t get their way, they go into sulk mode. A passive-aggressive withdrawal, cold shoulder, and shutdown tactics. We are to avoid the typical passive-aggressive response when we don’t get our way.
In conflict, we don’t have to wage this war alone. The best way to handle conflict constructively is to control the passion of anger.
“I didn’t realize what I was doing at the time. See now how much I have hurt you.”
The church is a reflection on earth of the oneness of the Triune God. Three in one, one in three, Holy Spirit, Son, and Father.
As leadership, we don’t want to only address the behavior. The question is “Why do deeply held beliefs influence our emotions, thoughts, and actions?”
We believe in grace in our heads, but not in the core of the soul of our heart and are betrayed by our hands. This is what James said who are doers of the word but just hearer only.